Results not typical and other Wet Blankets

  • I need to write about this to get it off my chest so I can move on from the "Stinking thinking" and be success oriented.

    Yesterday I was talking to my husband about how a lot of females don't see huge changes until week 8 or 9 in BFL. I'm in the tail end of C1W6 and I've begun seeing some changes like I have bicep definition and calve definition so I feel like I'm already ahead of the game.  But something he said really stuck in my craw.

    He said "You aren't going to see major changes in 12 weeks.  Those pictures in the book are the exception. "

    I refuse to believe it.  I refuse to accept that I won't be a success just like all the other people who have done Body for Life and have had success.  I thought back to when he had gone on his own weightloss journey and had stopped short of getting really ripped because as he said "I don't want to work as hard as it would take to get a six pack or change my diet to the point it would take to get it." 

    I told him maybe you didn't want that but I do!  I want the peak level of fitness for my age. And I want it before my 40th birthday.  AND  I am going to get it! If it takes me 12 weeks or if it takes me the rest of the year.  

    I also told him "When was the last time I had high expectations for myself??"  (I said this after he said "I just don't want you to have too high expectations and be disappointed when you don't get what you want.")  

    This time is different.  This time I will be the exception.

    Part of crossing the Abyss is not allowing other people's "well meaning" wet blankets from keeping you from your dreams.  

    Hopefully this post will be seen by someone else who's had a similar situation and it will help them.  

    You CAN do it.  You CAN be the exception.  

    See it!  Believe it!  Achieve it!


    Quit World of Warcraft, Quit Diet Coke, Quit Processed foods, Started Body For Life and got healthy.


  • Shoshie,

    In my opinion and experience, everyone, and I mean everyone, who sticks to the BFL Plan by the book is transformed. This forum is full of real people who have transformed thier lives with BFL. It is so easy for someone to be negative and say "those pics are photoshopped" or "those people are the exception" or whatever. The bottom line is BFL had changed thousands upon thousands of lifes around the world I has changed mine and it will change yours. Just look at some profiles on this site. There are so many people here who are not champions and are not in the book that have totaly transformed themselves.

    I understand, and so do many others here, about a partner or family member being a wet blanket. I always try to remember the four agreements and one of those is to not take anything personally. What people say has nothing to do with you but has to do with themselves. When someone tried to bring you down they are really upset with themselves for not having the strength and dedication you have. I hope I am not getting preachy or to personal.

    You can do this! You can acheive anything you set your mind to!

    I love your attitude! Positive and strong! Keep up the good work you are almost half way. The best and biggest changes are right in front of you. Keep Going!!!


  • He is afraid you will be in better shape than him and he will have to step it up a little. Keep pushing. I pushed and got so close but not all the way there when I began to doubt myself. I am back on my feet and pushing with you. You can do this...

    “"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out..." - Robert J. Collier”

  • In my opinion, getting "ripped" like some of the before/after photos in the book shouldn't be the major goal for a lot of people.

    After years and years of really poor eating habits and zero exercise, I'm ecstatic just be eating healthy and to be exercising again.

    Everything else is a bonus!

    If I'm still not satisified with my body at the end, I'll do another challenge.

  • Hummm.... I have an interesting story for you. At the beginning of my challenge I decided that I wanted to wear a string bikini (something I have never done before). I looked online and found a shiny blue one that was gorgeous. I showed the picture to my hubby and he laughted. "As you kidding that's for a 17 year old", he said. "You can never wear that"!!

    Because of his comment I decided to work extra hard and show him that I (someone about to turn 40) could indeed rock that tiny swimsuit. I remember the day I was ready to show him the suit. Now keep in mind that I typically wear jeans and sweaters because it is cold here in Massachusetts so he did not realize the changes that had occured.

    My hubby came home from work and there I was standing in this tiny bikini with spike heels and looking totally cut. His mouth dropped open, he was shocked and I said, "honey do you think I can get away with wearing this"? "You did say it was only for someone 17 right"?

    Needless to say, he ate his words.... check out the bathingsuit in my profile. ha ha..

    Prove your hubby wrong.. I did- and it felt great!


  • I know it's hard when your partner isn't completely on board with what you are doing.

    Mine doesn't believe that all the eating will result in weight loss, even with all the exercise.... I'm going to prove a certain someone wrong too!

  • My partner use to guilt trip me when I was about to weigh less than them. I fell for it for a while but not any more...

    “"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out..." - Robert J. Collier”

  • @pbmax..

    I totally agree about your statement about 'poor eating habits and zero exercise'.   I am just so happy to be eating healthy, exercising and found a program that makes 'sense' and doesnt take all your time!  Sure it takes dedication and WORK, but not hours a day.  


    I hope more people check out your blog.   I know way too many people that would see that you lost 'only' 13 pounds.. But then when they SEE you they have to have the reaction your husband did :)  Yes, you rock that bikini..

  • Shoshie:

    I don't know how much fat you have to lose, or where you are starting out, so it may take you more than one challenge.  But, so what???  What else are you going to be doing for the rest of your life?  I would say, just keep doing what you are doing and don't place too much pressure to look a certain way.  You may not look like someone else, but you will look like the best YOU!  Your husband will realize your conviction to this way of life, and he will more than likely follow suit when he sees the changes you have made, not just physically but in so many other areas in your life.  And, if he doesn't, then let it be your thing, and continue challenging yourself.  I am 43 and I am not in the same shape as some of the people in the book, but I did make great progress, and would say that BFL truly does work.  Best of luck to you for the duration of this current challenge and as you continue on the BFL journey.

    "The only person you should try to be better than, is the person you were yesterday!"

  • I want to thank everyone who has responded to my topic so far.  It really means a lot to me.  When I wrote that I was giving myself a pep talk as much as I was venting.  I'm at 28.5% body fat right now (which is about where I was when I started the program) and I do look pretty decent.  I am doing this for health and fitness just as much as I am for how I'll look.  It doesn't matter how many challenges it takes me because this IS for life!  

    I'm already stronger and faster then when I started the challenge and I plan to be even more so by the end of it all.

    Today I went and put together a new playlist for my iPod for my workouts so I can get even that much more motivated to hit all my 10's when I go to the gym!


    Quit World of Warcraft, Quit Diet Coke, Quit Processed foods, Started Body For Life and got healthy.


  • I love your post Shoshie! You go girl!

    Live life with passion!

  • It will probably take me more than one challenge too.  I truly want to be fit. I'm also on week 6 and have been pretty good with the program. I haven't seen any results yet unless you call the following "results":

    - I can lift my four year old easily compare to before the challenge

    - I can carry her upstairs easily too

    - I can push myself further on my cardio

    - Today I finally was able to finish the toughest abs sequence that the trainer had for me!!!! :)

    - I feel great to be doing this! Every day is an adventure...

    I wish I could run like you a 5K race... I'm thinking, first finish the challenge, then do two weeks active rest and explore other ways to fitness (swimming, spinning, zumba, pilates etc) then do my second challenge (it will keep me focused). But ONE STEP AT A TIME!

    Tomorrow is another adventure!

    Live life with passion!

  • That is a great story from Lorig. My hubby is similar, not 'saying' those words, but sometimes trying to push me to eat junk food with him.  And he'll be so persistant, saying "I'm testing you."...  I don't know if it's a good thing or mean thing.  I figure I can't isolate myself and stop living with him for 12 weeks, just have to deal.  Sometimes I give in and eat 1 chip or whatever just to shut him up.  And other times I'm able to say no completely.  I know it's 'cuz of him insecurity.  He's gotten better since the beginning though, but still sometimes does this.

  • You'll find a LOT of insecure people try to trip you up with words.  Ignore it, take it as a compliment or use it for motivation.  

    Wen I was in my second or third week, I had someone ask why I was working so hard.  I told them I was doing Body-for-LIFE.  "Oh, you mean that book with all those crazy transformations?  You could NEVER win that"  

    I used that for motivation for a couple weeks, then let it go.  I told myself that ultimately the motivation had to come from within.  I wanted it to be about me, and my hard work, not what someone had said.  

    "You could never win that!"  Hah!

    Matthew McClelland

    2010 Grand Master Champion

  • Lori!

    What an awesome transformation! Good for you! :-)