I'm back. Bbefore Xmas I hit my 8 week mark and was going strong. Took a few days off for the holidays, no biggie, then depression hit. Big time. I was already a bit up and down, and but I just lost it. Drove away friends, made poor choices which is the manic side, and basically fell off the wagon.
I would liketo say that I am better now, but I know I'm not. But I have a year long plan to get better, to nip this palava in the bud once and for all.
One thing that really worked for me, was my daily log here. Kept me honest and on track. I want to keep dong that, but with pictures this time, and maybe a little more venting.
A lot more venting.
For one, 7" androidtablet pales in comparison to typing on an ipaad. This post took forever!
8 weeks was great going, I fell off at 8 weeks too. The comedown is quite rocky, didn't realise how much BFL can lift your mood. I don't have depression but I do suffer a little from anxiety and I worry all the time. My sad light and BFL helps a lot.
Glad you have a plan and that you are getting back on track. A years a long way ahead, one day at a time might help.
Venting is great. I love a good vent. Vent away :-) x
Things I hated today
Depression sucks. I fight with it. Winter seems to be the worst. And, it seems to have become worse as I have aged.
If I may:
The Things I hated Today:
Waking up at 3:30 AM, realizing that a year ago, when I was moved to a new position at work without any input, it was to make room for the pr!ck I am under to make room for his friend's wife. I have been taking deep beaths most of the day.
Things I liked:
5:30 AM Airdyne Cardio Solution.
Sorry to impose.
"Hypochondriacs are their own terrorists." Saul Bellow
Your hated lists are longer than your liking lists. As much as I love to vent also, have you thought about changing the lists to.... Things I like today and things I am going to change.
Just a suggestion before your hated lists swallow any positivity you do have whole, and you are left with nothing.
Things I hated on the weekend
Things I liked on the weekend
Things I hated yesterday
Things I liked yesterday
I am so proud of you. You obviously achieved lot. If you really want to get off the fat, you can try boiling the food for one week without adding any oil. It worked really well for me. And also, only boiling chicken breast. Eat lots of egg white. Vegetable. No sugar at all.
Things i hated today
yesterday was actually pretty good, I ate we'll and did good cardio. Today the depression won though. Started off ok but then...I dunno all I could think was how much my friends must hate me and that I must hate them, I ate decentlyy, I got changed to go to the gym, got there, but I couldn't do my leg extensions. It wasn't heavier, and I even went heavier, but I just couldn't lift it. Tried swapping to lunges, but it hurt. I literally had to hold back tears and go home, haven't yet left my room. I hope tomorrow is better. I think I will grab iPod and walk to work, probably need the space and time
I love me some zombie! and a good pee!
Good for you Pathetic guy. Just keep working hard on yourself. You will win!
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