I'm Not Sticking to It - No willpower -- Help!

  • I started out really well, but then it all went down hill from there.  Summertime brings friends and family in droves to our home to play in the pool and the last three weeks (I started the challenge on July 4th) have been nothing but unhealthy food, drink (alcohol) and no exercise.  Of course I haven't lost any weight nor have I gotten into the routine I wanted.  My willpower is nil.  I need to get motivated again and pushed to keep up.   Any advice?

  • Plan ahead...have healthy things you can eat for when friends/family come over.  Take the 1 hour/day out as "you" time and make sure you get in the gym and do your workout.  Most of all, don't beat yourself up in your head.  Your probably your own worst enemy by telling yourself you have no will power and can't do this. You can!

  • Thank you for your reply BBrahma.  You are correct, I am my worst enemy.  I will work on that.

  • JustJen, as a chocoholic, cake-a-holic, coffee mocha aholic, who has just completed her 2nd week today, let me say that the 1st few days are the hardest.  I have NEVER done anything like this before.  I've said in my posts that the longest diet I've ever had has been 8 hours prior to this.  Keep looking at these boards.  Join one of the groups. It really helps.  

    I had to scream for help over a lemon tart the second day and someone responded with total support and I avoided it and now I'm on a roll.  Also if you have something that's suppposed to be on your free day, just scrap it and move on.  

    You can do it!


  • Thanks Ang!  Glad to know that I'm not the only one with a "holic" issue!  I will get back on the "horse"!  I've been reading and viewing the before/after pics and I know I can do this, I just need to get my head in the game.

  • I do two things to keep me motivated.. I am in week 7 and believe me, I have had my ups and downs. I actually have my before picture on my phone... I look at that picture to remind myself why I am doing this challenge when I have a week moment...some have suggested putting the pic on your fridge, but I didn't want my whole fam to loose their appetite, lol!  and actually I took more pics at week 5, even though my clothes did not feel much difference and I could not see the changes.. the changes were there, so now I have my day 1 and week 5... that is motivation!! I tend to get discouraged because I think I am not seeing results and I think that is very common among us women.  The first week, I logged onto this website multiple times daily and checked out before and after photo's, that really helped me in the beginning and still today!! Good luck and hang in there! It's so worth it to look in the mirror and like what you see!! OH and the longer you stick with it, the better your energy level will be and your overall happiness/ mood! I actually have weened myself off of my antidepressants.. *****I don't recommend this to anyone else without seeking advise from your physician***** but to give you an idea of how much better I feel!! It's awesome, even if I don't see physical changes, it's still so worth it for me!!

  • You can do it, but I do think you have to be ready! I tried over and over and over for years. I am finally sticking to it. The first few days were the toughest...then I started looking forward to feeling better.

    I stopped making excuses. We had a potluck three days into my first week and I told them "No." I didn't make it my free day...I just brought my lunch as usual.

    The thing that has kept me on track the most is planning. I have to plan every meal and my day around meals.

    You can certainly do it!

  • I struggle with the unlimited friends and family and garbage food and drink that finds it's way in to our lake house during the summer.  Look around you at the people at your gathering are they fit and in good shape?  If not then you know why.  

    It is worth every moment of just saying no to the poor choices.  Have fresh fruit, cold hard boiled eggs, grilled chicken and roasted sweet potatoes ready to eat for yourself or include them in the menu if you are grilling.  

    One of the most difficult choices we have to make is to choose ourselves over what everyone is doing, eating and saying.

    At the end of they day it comes down to choices.

    The choice truly is yours.  But that's the kicker...IT'S YOUR CHOICE.

    Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right ~ Henry Ford

    Michelle Simpson ~2009 Body-for-LIFE Champion 46+ Catagory

  • One part of the book that really made sense to me was to identify patterns of action that prevent you from achieving your goals so you can avoid those patterns and then invent new patterns that help you achieve them.

    Specifically, if I can get myself to the gym, I always have a good workout and I always feel better, even if it feels like a tired slump day. So I started this trick that has been working for me every time.

    Step 1: Find something positive about the gym that is always positive to you, regardless of wether you workout. For me, this is sitting in the spa and sauna after the workout. I would always enjoy making a trip to the gym just to do this by itself.

    Step 2: Whenever you need to go to the gym, say to yourself "Im tired, but I will just go and sit in the spa and sauna because I like that. If I feel like working out when I get there, so be it." For me once I get there, then I say to myself "Ill just put on my workout clothes and start doing the workout, if I get tired, ill just stop and enjoy the spa/sauna". At this point, I already feel ready to workout and have never avoided it.

    Maybe this works for others, but it really has been a boone to me. I am also getting to the point where the "feeling" of the gym in my mind is now positive, so I actually look forward to going rather than dreading it.

  • Wow, what wonderful advice. It really motivated me too!  I love all the ideas.  We have lots of friends and family days during the summer too. I especially agree that PLANNING is the most important thing you can do.  Fail to plan is planning to fail. We have failed to put US and our health in the top priority slot and look where its gotten us. My family is THRILLLED that I pushed myself to the top and love that I look and feel good even though they didn't like it too much in the beginning. Grilling can actually be a good friend to you on BFL. Grilled chicken, lean beef or chicken sausages and grilled veggies, baked potato (regular or sweet) is so yummy!  

    About the gym - I found that putting my workout clothes on when I got up (or as soon as I get home from work) even my running shoes really helps. I DO NOT dwell on what it will be like to workout or how hard or anything like that I don't let myself even think about it - I can think about how hard it is when I am doing it, so why think about it ahead of time!  We torment ourselves!

    I am in week 6 of my second challenge. I need to go to BFL website or the book every single day to keep me motivated. I visualize my body looking the way I want it to during every workout and as I fall asleep at night. I plan the night before what I am going to eat for my 3 meals (I have shakes the other 3) and I make sure my 22 oz bottle is finished at 12:00, 3:00, 6:00 and 9:00. Keep all your meal appointments or you will get hungry and go for the bad stuff.  

    This is a committment you have to make with yourself. One of the things I am learning is that I am worth committing to. I deserve to have good health, energy and looking as good as I can.  Its only 12 weeks - 84 days with 12 free days!   You have to tell yourself outloud that you "deserve this."  I thought that was a kind of corny thing I saw on Biggest Loser, but when I actually thought about it I realized thats exactly why I wasn't healthy.  

    My favorite life quote also comes from Biggest Loser Trainer Jillian Michaels - 'Why choose to fail when success is an option?"  

    Choose to succeed - you deserve it!!!!  Lets do this together!


  • Great quote from Jillian there,  SOOOO True.  I am glad you are back on track please, please stay with it. I know it's tough (like being tempted with pizza WHILE you're at the gym doing a workout last week for me) but you have to hang in there.  And like we said here on BFL when dealing with social events....sometimes you just have to eat that cake....but always remember you don't have to eat it all(or in otherwords go overboard....just enough to be social...like I had to do at a company awards function yesterday....took the smallest piece possible on the table and only a half glass of the lemonade.... the VP of the Park was in attendence then).

  • Seems we all struggle with the same basic issues.  It's amazing how we tend to focus so much on food/drink at our social gatherings, not to mention rely upon it to lift our spirits when we're down, celebrate when we've accomplished some great feat, and the list goes on and on!  I'm totally with you on the will power thing, BUT the difference this time is I determined at the beginning of my BFL committment (I'm only in week 3 so definitely not a pro yet ~ SMILE ~) that I would not let anyone guilt me into splurging if it wasn't my free day.  We've had more get togethers, birthday parties, and just plain southern eatings than I could tell you in three weeks, and each time, I have had folks telling me, come on just try this or that.  I decided that my health and happiness are just as important as theirs.  I have no idea how you are as a person, but can speak for myself.  I have always been a "people pleaser."  Everyone else and their feelings came before mine.  Yes, if it would hurt their feelings that I didn't taste their homemade banana pudding, or whatever dish they brought, then by all means, out the window my diet went.  Well, I'm proud to say, not this time!  I haven't been rude about it, just told them up front that I've made the choice to eat healthier and become more fit, and not to plan on my participating in the actual meals.  The most recent meal was this past Sunday at my in laws.  My mother-in-law, who I truly love with all my heart, could not believe I was going to bring my own food to her house.  After 27 years of her home cooking (authentic Mexican dishes are her specialty), she was beside herself and almost offended at the thought, and I was not only bringing food to her house, I was doing it on her birthday!!!   LOL  I say all that to say, we are worth it!  I calmly and respectfully reaffirmed that I was making changes for no one, even offering that should she want me to paricipate in the food portion of the festivities, we could reschedule her party for one of my off days (a Saturday). With that, she laughed, and said she was going to go on the same program as me when her birthday was behind her because she could see it was working!!!  You can do this.  As the old saying goes, you have only failed if you fail to try.  Since you are posting on this forum, you are trying!  Go get 'em!!!  You are on your way!!

  • Every day is a new day and a new opportunity to shape tomorrow. The last few weeks are in the past. Let them go and have a fresh start. You used to have no willpower.( You have to stop thinking that.)

    from this moment on you are different and you can choose differently. Exercise your choosing muscles.

    Get back in touch with your wantpower. review all the reasons why you WANT this-for yourself and others.

  • Wow, you all are truly wonderful and so very inspirational.  I got goosebumps and teary eyed reading all of your heartfelt replies.  You all are great motivators!  Wish I had you all in my pocket at 4:30 am when I'm trying to get out of my warm bed to go to the gym!  That is my only free time in my day.  I cannot fathom that you, Bchgirl, brought your own food to your mother-in-laws!  That's dedication right there!  Thank you all so much.  I will try harder and will succeed.  Thanks for the motivation and I will return to read these again and again  to keep me going!  :)