Today is Monday, yesterday was our free day. We both feel tired and drugged down today. My wife and I both were forced to take naps today. Its like were on day one. We didn't even eat anything that horrible, just over carbed, but nothing major. I don't understand, is this normal? Were on day 12 since we started. Also, neither of us have noticed any change in our physical appearance yet. However we do feel better, just not the day after our free day.
Those free days are the worst. Some of the old VCR videos I have of the first contenders of BFL show the guys talking in the cafeteria saying they never took their free day and were doing 4k+ calories a day intake. I've tried BFL 17 times in 8 years and never got past week 5, and I believe that was partially based on the free days and how influential they were on my weak conscience. This is my 18th time and starting week 2 and haven't missed a day yet; except for the great fact that it feels great to take a one day break on exercise - I'm never free-dayin' again.
Take a picture of just your face... I bet its smaller. If not, make sure you have no breaks between sets and muscle groups and that you go to failure in your last set every time.
Don't get discouraged... Change takes time! Although I am am certain you are already noticing a few things... Like easier to go to sleep, easier to get up in the morning, the Monday hangover :-)
Here I what I try to prescribe to... If on my off day, I cheat a little, go to the gym a little... It wont hurt... Your body is trying to get used to something that you are doing 6 days a week... Why change it all on just one day??? Even a simple mouse would get lost if you changed the maze once a week.
As far as food... Be as good as you can... as clean as you can... Even when others around you are not... portion yourself to be included in what is being eaten, but not so much that you wreck what you have been working for... Before you know it... this will become your lifestyle and you will love it!!!
From the mental point of view, I think, part of the free days (at least for me) is to, yes, allow to indulge in a few treats, that star bucks coffee, or pasta dinner you might have been craving, but it also is to show you the contrast of what those choices do to your body especially if you overdo it.
A piece of chocolate is not going to give you a hang over, but a bar of chocolate, a pasta dinner, ice cream for dessert, topped off with a big creamy 600 kcal coffee probably will.
Think back and realize what you did to your body while that was not your cheat or exception, but the daily way you treated your body. Your body is starting to know better and to appreciate the new approach, allow your mind to listen to it and embrace it and before you know it your cheat day will be that one piece of chocolate and will satisfy you perfectly fine. If you start feeling sick don't get hung up on feeling guilty about it, but allow your mind to realize "see, you really don't want to do this again, you really don't want to crave those masses of treats anymore".
I made the mistake for the first couple weeks to let a friend of mine really push me on cheat days because it was a way for him to go out and feel more comfortable to indulge while I was around. Instead of listening to my body telling me... "you know, that 1/2 piece of cheese cake was really good but you really had enough now" I would finish the cake and then go out for coffee with him afterwards. Instead of 1800 kcal I would consume close to 4000 kcal.
By getting really REALLY uncomfortable a few times its almost like my mind has jumped into self protection mode telling me "you really want to feel sick again? Blargh! No! Duah"
I now have the urge to day no (first I was going to say "gotten the strength to say no".. but really it would take strength and forcing myself now to eat what I used to), enjoy that 1/2 piece, tell my friend "just because its my cheat day, it doesn't mean I have to hurt myself" and then when he wants a coffee I get a big cup of water to clean my pallet of the dessert flavor and I actually truly enjoy it.... because I physicallly do feel much better and know that contrast. My mind does not want me to hurt my body but I think I had to allow for that experience to develop the internal drive and conviction to develop the aversion of doing so and to listen to my body.
Physically, I think you ought to have some sort of slip once in a while. I don't mean the 4000Kcal cheat, but the ice cream or piece of cake. Your body gets very efficient and adapts quickly to consistency. Efficiency is not what you want for it means more stuff is stored and less is burned. Having the occasional little bump in calories makes sure your metabolism doesn't drop due to the increase in efficiency.